Lincoln Constable: The “Average Guy From Canada”

(I’m the guy who wants to lip sync battle Jimmy Fallon)

eyebrows

Well hello there, internet. You’re looking gorgeous today.

My name is Lincoln Constable, and I am just an average guy from Canada.

But wait, there’s more!

I’m an average guy from Canada who wants to go toe-to-toe with Jimmy Fallon in an epic lip syncing battle.

That’s right Jimmy, I’m challenging YOU!

Now, chances are, you’ve got questions – so I’m here to answer ‘em.

1. Who the heck is Lincoln Constable?

I’m an average guy from Canada. I live in a city called Calgary. There are a lot of cows around. I work at an airport, where my job is to keep planes from crashing into each other and stop them from running over my friends. I really like to lip sync.

I guess that’s all the important stuff.

2. Why do you want to battle Jimmy Fallon?

Ever since I first poked my head out of the womb, I was lip syncing. It was actually quite frightening to the doctors and they made me stay in a special container for awhile until they realized I was just mouthing the words to Def Leppard’s “Pour Some Sugar On Me”.

From that moment on, I’ve been training, waiting for the day a worthy opponent would reveal themselves. I believe that opponent is Jimmy Fallon, and while I admire him greatly, I must now destroy him. There can only be one.

But honestly, I love his show and would be honoured to take him on in a couple rounds of no-holds-barred lip syncing.

 3. I’m from a newspaper/website/radio station/The Tonight Show and I want to help make all your wildest dreams come true. How can I contact you?

I can be reached for interviews, appearances, racy photoshoots and large bags of money at averageguyfromcanada@gmail.com

4. Why don’t you shave your beard?

Some people do not seem to appreciate the large, voluptuous neckbeard I have grown. What they do not seem to realize is that:

a) I live in Canada and it is very cold up here
b) My beard is the true source of my power

Without it, I’d be like Samson after he got a haircut.

manly

5. Why did you wear a dirty shirt in the video?

Actually, the shirt is not dirty. It is a shirt with a picture of stars and wolves on it. Up here, the more wolves you can fit on a shirt, the more women will notice you and want to ride in your pickup truck. This shirt has three wolves – so basically, it’s irresistible. The white spec in the video is a star that the wolves are howling at majestically.

whitespot

But if I am being honest, the shirt was not entirely clean. In Canada, the water does not unfreeze until July when we are able to do laundry for a brief window of approximately 72 hours before everything freezes right back up again.

I wore a flannel shirt in the first few takes, but the combination of beard and flannel was so intimidating to look at that I was worried Jimmy would be too scared to watch my video. That is also why I chose so many songs with high-pitched vocals.

6. Why do you have such bad taste in music?

Like my beard, some people don’t seem to like the songs I chose. I’m not sure what songs they wanted me to lip sync to instead – probably a lot of Maroon 5 or something.

I briefly debated keeping it Canadian with some Rush, Celine Dion, Nickleback and Justin Bieber, but I don’t think people would have liked that very much at all.

7. Have you heard from Jimmy yet?

No, not yet – but my video has been shown on Buzzfeed, Salon, Gawker and a whole bunch of other neat websites like the Globe and Mail.

I really hope to hear from him soon – maybe he’s biding his time, working on his eyebrow wiggles and training up for a big showdown.

8. How can I help?

Just enjoy the video! If it brightens your day, my job is already done. The video was always intended to make people smile; that it’s gotten so much attention is a surprise! You can also share it on Facebook, Twitter and maybe on one of those cool airplanes that fly the banners behind them.

 

Cheers, Jimmy – Hope to See You Soon!

lincoln

 

(Special thanks to my copywriter friend Joel, The Best Looking Man In the World, for helping me make this handy website.)

22 thoughts on “Average Guy From Canada

  1. You’re such a talented young man! Pretty handsome and crazy funny!!! Can’t wait to see more videos! ~Mom

  2. You bring joy wherever you go everyday. It would be selfish to keep you all to ourselves at work. You were a big part of my daughter’s special day touring our work place. We’re both cheering you on! If you make the show or not, know that you have 2 fans here!

  3. If anyone deserves this kind of an opportunity it’s you! You have always been such a humorous guy with a friendly smile and quirky personality. I watched your video with my friend Keith and we both think you are incredibly talented. Not only that but we giggled at how expressive your face and eyebrows are. I hope Jimmy takes you up on your offer because he’s missing out if he doesn’t. GOOO Lincoln!!! :)

  4. Absolutely epic man, can’t think of any others words to describe what’s going on with this video. Is anyone else having a hard time keeping battery in their phones the last couple days!?
    #teamlincoln #averageguyfromcanada

  5. Lip synch challenge on Fallon is more than just “lip” synch-ing. Show us all your stuff – need the dance moves an’ all man!!

  6. Hi Lincoln

    my name is Kenny, I host the midday show at 96.9 JACKfm in Vancouver…Any chance we can do a quick interview to talk about your quest! Could be lots of fun.

    The interview would be taped and run just a few min. Nothing hard hitting, just for fun

    Thoughts?

    Kenny

  7. LOVED the Video and I really hope that your dream comes true. I would love to see a fellow Calgarian take on Jimmy.

  8. Great Laugh :) good luck from a couple peeps in saskatchewan! lil side-note… flannel is where it’s at. ohh… and last but not least… you also dance?! this needs to happen.

  9. I would drive my Zamboni a long way to see this, and pay many timbits for front row seating. Hope you take Jimmy out for a rip ;)

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